So you finally found the person of your dreams? At the very least you have found someone who you want to continue to spend time with? You have now decided that you are going to take the big step of using your hard earned coins to take a trip. It’s your very first baecation and you want to make sure that the trip goes off without a hitch. Well your girl is here to help you navigate this big decision and avoid some very real pitfalls. Let me help you plan that first baecation!
It only took two weeks before me and my significant other ended up taking a trip together. (Yes, the OG spinster is out here with a man…) I went to handle a family situation which resulted in one early morning flight and a two day road trip halfway across the country. That situation taught me a lot, and when I couple it with my knowledge of planning solo trips, I’ve got a great guide for those couples who want to nail their first baecation!
Deciding Where You Want to Go
It’s important to know if you are the type of person who wants the journey or the destination. I personally am a journey person. Road trips are my jam and usually when I get to my destination I am ready to go lay down. I stick to tourist activities and local cuisine. It isn’t really my style to hit up clubs, resorts, or parties. I, of course, have attached myself to a destination driven partner. So where does the compromise come in?
A perfect example was the second trip that boo thang and I took. We bookended a mini road trip with two clear destinations that could be explored. We flew into Las Vegas (a destination driven location) and did a little road trip to the Grand Canyon (another destination location). Both my partner and I were able to have an activity that we enjoyed while also providing an experience where the other person was comfortable and able to enjoy the other partner’s activities. In between we spent some time on the road to have a bit of a “journey” aspect to our trip.
When planning a trip with a significant other, you want to make sure that each partner is fulfilled during the trip unless your stance is going to be to alter trips back and forth. It is a quick road to an argument if one partner feels that their needs are being ignored.
Motel, Hotel, Airbnb
I learned the hard way that I am a lodging snob. There are some people who don’t care where they lay their head as long as it is clean. I am not that person. If the walk from the parking lot is too long, I’m mad. Is the TV a smart tv so I can watch Netflix or is it in the stone age? What did the reviews say about the water pressure? I want to know it all because I will be quick to catch an attitude. Your first baecation is a great time to start to establish if and in what aspect you are a travel snob.
Lodging is one of the big hurdles that any couple needs to clear to have a successful first baecation and subsequent baecations. Each partner should make a list of what they need and what they aren’t going to put up with. While creating this list, each person should consider where they can compromise and what is truly realistic. If you are going to be spending most of your time in your room or around the room then it should be a place that is truly comfortable. If you are only planning to sleep there, then there may be a few corners that can be cut. This allows the money for lodging to be given to a different area.
How to Handle an Argument
It happens. I shouldn’t have to say this but I feel obligated to mention that arguments happen. They should always be handled with care. You don’t want to end up thousands of miles away from home with a person that you now can’t stand to look at. I also don’t want any of you out here in these streets like this one couple I saw who had a huge blowout in the middle of the airport. My boo thang and I watched the whole thing in shock, awe, horror, and amusement. You can not comprehend the ghetto of it all.
Arguments on vacation hit different to me than arguments in a place of comfort. If you are home then you have an established routine and you probably have several options regarding ways that you can cool down. If you are in a country where you don’t speak the language or don’t feel safe wandering around alone, then you have to come up with a different tactic.
One suggestion is to stop or pause the argument before it gets heated. Before someone says something that they can’t take back, attempt to insert a small or large cool down period. This could mean that one person sits in the lobby while the other stays in the room. Even a small walk to the ice machine can give each person some time to cool down and take a second look at the situation.
Another suggestion is to always make sure that there is a contingency plan. You should always have money to get home if something happens. In the case that the relationship meets its demise. Try to come up with a plan of how to keep things cordial. This will require each person to be accountable for their words and actions and be adult about the situation.
Keep This in Mind
You should talk about funding the trip in detail before you start clicking the button to book flights and hotels. Ya’ll know that you have to eat right? It isn’t helpful to the trip to wing something that could cost you hundreds or more dollars down the line. A lot of people want to flex on their first baecation. It isn’t much of a flex if you get home and can’t pay your rent because you wanted bottle service.
Make a plan if someone gets sick. It’s not fun but it happens. Do you want to be on a boat ride with food poisoning? If one person can’t go does the other person still go to the Vegas show that ya’ll paid $200 a ticket for? If you are supposed to be walking but one person sprains an ankle then what do you do? I have some tips for traveling sick that you can check out right here.
I want to also make mention that a vacation can temporarily add stress to a relationship. Going to Mexico isn’t going to save anything. Do you though…
That’s all folks! Check out my list of questions, “Travel Insurance,” to help plan out your best couples trip.